The Statue Maker (a poop joke)

“Hey Parnell, make a statue for us!” We all laughed at Wendell’s suggestion, “I even brought grape soda to give it a nice green color.”

Some of the girls were a bit confused by the suggestion.  “Grape soda, isn’t that purple?” one of the girls said.

“Haha, it is purple when you drink it,” laughed Wendell, “but the way Parnell makes his statues is so disgusting.”

The girls shook their heads uncomprehending.

“Come on Parnell, show the girls how its done!”

Parnell stood glaring down at Wendell, with his big black fists pressed to his hips.  “Why you want me to do that?  I only showed you that in private.”  At six foot and five inches Parnell was a huge bulk of a man.

Only a few of us knew about Parnell’s interesting talent for making statues, but only his friend Wendell would have the balls to ask him to do it in front of the girls.

“Come on man, you eaten enough of those ribs; all meaty and sticky.  You should have enough material to work with.”

“What are you talking about?” said one of the girls.

“Here drink up!” Wendell shoved a can of grape soda toward Parnell, mix this in and then shove one out!”

“Hey, it will take some time to digest,” said Parnell, snatching the can from Wendell’s grasp, and then downing the whole can in a few big gulps, before letting out a huge belch.

earth-575528_640The girls suddenly understood, and one of them yelled, “Oh that’s disgusting!”  The other one said, “You are joking, right!”

“See,” said Parnell, “they don’t want to see.”

“Sure they do!  Right, you girls want to see.”

The girls held their fingers to their noses and shook their heads.

“Well, it ain’t ready yet, anyway,” said Parnell.

“How you know when it is ready?” asked Wendell.

“When it’s all nice and creamy,” Parnell began to clench his butt cheeks and thrust his hips.  “Yup, got to get it all mixed up.  When the tube is all nice and greasy”

“You guys are pigs!”  The girls stormed off.

The guys followed the girls inside, and ended up playing one their combat video games, while the girls sat around rolling their eyes over how juvenile guys are, until Parnell lifted one of his enormous butt cheeks of the sofa cushion and let go of a huge fart.

“That’s so nasty!” said one of the girls and ran from the room.  The other girl followed.

“Damn, man that stinks!” said Wendell.  He pauses the game and jumped up, waving a pillow around to disperse the smell.

“Hahaha, that what you get for being a douche!”

“Does that mean you are ready to make one?

“Ah, man you never let up!” groaned Parnell.

“That sounded all nice and greasy to me.”

“Fine, you want me to make one, I’ll make one, but you own me big time!”

“Hey, girls, Parnell is going to make a statue for us.  You got to come watch!”

“We don’t want to see it,” they yelled back almost in unison.

Parnell and Wendell walked back out onto the patio.  “Come on girls, its not what you think.  It’s even better.”

The girls gave each other a strange look, and then reluctantly followed them out.

Parnell pulled a short table into the middle of the patio.  He pulled down his baggy jeans and boxer shorts, then pulled his T-shirt over his considerable penis and balls, cupping them in his large hands.  Then he bent over and straddled the table.

“What are you doing?” gasped one of the girls.  They tried to turn away, but Wendell had gotten behind them and would not let the leave.

Standing in front of Parnell, they watched him start making grunting noises.  He twitched his eyebrows and forehead, twisting his cheeks and flexing his nose with each push and contraction of his anal muscles.

One of the girls began to laugh, making the other one nervously giggle.  “OH, I see, you two are just messing with us!  Very funny.”

“Just watch!” said Wendell.

Standing behind Parnell, you could see his ass muscles working, rhythmically flexing and relaxing.  His squatting posture pulled his butt crack wide open, showing his pink asshole.  This sphincter muscles spasmed in timed response to his facial gestures, shaping the turd that was slowly slipping from his ass.  Parnell began to bounce on the balls of his feet to help his statue drop.  With one final push, and one last contraction, it fell nicely onto the table.

Parnell then bent down and pulled up his boxers and jeans, stuffing his junk back into his pants, then stepped away from the table, pointing to his creation.

Both of the girls put their hands over their mouths and made gagging noises.

“So, how do you like it,” said Parnell, “what does it look like to you?”

statue-309467_640Wendell shoved the reluctant girls forward, to get a closer look at the green lump on the table.  The girls turned their eyes away, and broke free of Wendell, running back into the house, shouting: “nasty, disgusting, gross.”

Wendell put his hands over his mouth to take a closer look.  “Hey, man that’s a good one.  It looks just like the Statue of Liberty!”




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